Verse: Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you. - Psalms 9:10Topic: How can I have faith when God keeps letting me down?
Personal Piece: I recently learned an interesting fact: We are only born with TWO innate fears. Only two! The fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. Meaning ALL the rest are learned from people or circumstances. For me (and for most people) fear has always been a very real issue in my life. For 22 years I was so wrapped up in social phobias that I would hardly step out of my room let alone initiate a conversation. The friends I had were those who reached out to me and some of them were good, some of them not so much. I was so terrified of rejection that I would take whatever or whoever I could get, even if knew they just wanted to use me. Then Jesus broke in...but that's a story for another time. The bottom line: I won't be controlled by fear anymore and you don't have to either and that's what this entry is all about.
Thought of the Week: Nothing but water surrounded them. They had left the shore hours ago and now there was nothing but water and their little boat. After weeks of being surrounded by nearly hundreds, sometimes thousands of strangers, it was good to just sit in silence surrounded by their closest friends. The last few weeks had been such a whirlwind for Simon. It had happened right here on this very lake. He had practically grown up on its shores and when he was old enough, he had joined the men in their boats to fish. He knew these waters as though he were a fish himself and his brother Andrew had been at his side as long as he could remember.
Simon stood at the helm of the boat watching the sparkle of the moon as it glittered and danced on the dark surface. James was sitting nearby with a net draped in the water taking the advantage of the calm night to catch his fish. Simon briefly wondered if he missed his old life as a fisherman as much as Simon did. Missed his family and the life they'd had before. He could see the contemplative look in James' eyes and knew it mirrored his own. They had all left something behind. They had gained something too but there were days when they couldn't help but wonder if it was worth it. There were whispers, rumors that the teacher they followed was a false prophet who was leading them away from God. His own wife had said those same things when last he had seen her.
Laughter flitted toward him from the back of the boat and he looked to see that the others joking about some antic that the teacher had pulled on the way back from Capernaum. He had only known these 12 men for a few months and already he felt like he knew them better than his own family. They were like brother and whatever was to come he would be glad to face it with these men. The boat jolted suddenly as if struck by a wave but that was impossible, it was a clear night surely not the type of night for a storm. When she boat shook again he knew they were in trouble. Where was the teacher now? Where was the man who had healed so many people just last week? Why was he not there helping them regain control of the boat? Was he just going to let them drown?
Far too often we get caught up in the same thought patterns of Simon Peter in this story. When we first start following Jesus everything seems pretty good. Like Peter we are filled with new revelations of Jesus and we see amazing things happen (Peter himself saw countless miracles including the healing of his mother-in-law just prior to this event). We fill our days with Jesus. Sunday service, Monday prayer, Wednesday small groups, Friday events, Saturday outreaches not to mention personal study and prayer. But then comes that moment when everything slows down. We get in the boat and get to breathe in the fresh air. It's refreshing to slow down and contemplate just how far we've come, to partake in fellowship of like-minded individuals. Those are some of my favorite moments...but they can also some of my darkest.
Have you ever had a moment when you forgot to invite Jesus into your thought life? That happens to me ALL THE TIME! Life is going so good that I forget that I need him. That's when the doubts start to creep in. I think of the things I've lost following Jesus and wonder if it's worth it. I think of what people say about Jesus and wonder if it's true. Sometimes it's even the people I'm closest to who put those doubts in my mind and that makes it twice as hard. That's when the storm comes in. I find it interesting that a storm this huge was able to sneak up on the disciples when at least four of them had been fishermen on that very lake. You would have thought they would see the signs and yet too often it is the things that we are most familiar with that take us off guard. And when those storms roll in it is hard not to wonder if Jesus has abandoned us, fallen asleep like he did then and left us to our own devices.
What's amazing though, is that Jesus tells his disciples that their fear is revealing their lack of faith. Why was Jesus so calm in this moment? How was he able to sleep when everyone else was in a panic? I think it was easy. Jesus had said "we're going to other side of the lake" (Matthew 8:18) and that's exactly what he intended to do. He had talked to his father and knew that there was something important waiting for them on the other side. What was a simple act of nature in comparison to a promise from God himself. When God gives his children promises he fully intends to bring them to fruition and the storms of this life can't get in the way.
Jesus doesn't turn his back on those who are truly searching for him. The more you seek him the more he'll reveal himself and the more he reveals himself the more you will learn to trust him. Look at Abraham who had been promised a son and a great nation but when those doubts started creeping in he found his own solution. It was Esau's birthright to have a part in those promises but his flesh overcame God's word and he turned his back on what God had given him and the anointing was placed instead on his brother. Jesus himself said that a kingdom divided will not stand (Matt 12:25). We cannot stand together if we are standing in fear. Fear has no place in the kingdom of God and it is the desire of Jesus to deliver each of us from all fear so that his kingdom can stand united. Fear cannot be fought without faith and faith is only found by keeping our gaze on the only one who can calm the storms.
Digging Deeper: The full story of Jesus calming the storms can be found in Matthew 8:23-27 and Luke 8:22-25. To see what happened to Peter the next time there was a storm read Matthew 14:22-34, Mark 6:45-56, or Luke 6:16-24
The story of Abraham's struggle with God's promises can be found in Genesis 15-18 and 21-22
The story of Esau giving up his birthright is found in Genesis 27 and 28
This entry was inspired by a recent sermon I heard by Mike Bickle from his sermon series "Studies in the Life of Christ". That specific sermon can be found here.
Three songs came up on my Pandora while writing this entry that really tied into the theme of choosing faith over fear. I encourage you to check them out. These songs are:
I Am Yours by Lauren Daigle,
and King of the World by Natalie Grant.
As always feel free to leave a comment or a question. I'd love to hear from you.
Excellent word! I'm finally caught up on all 3 and found them not only well written but very insightful and uplifting. Bravo! (I even shared one on FB.)
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